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The Colbert Report/Episode/557
Production Info |- |} |- |} Intro The Gibbs-Plant Phone War * Dr. Colbert took two swigs of Sierra Mist * Stephen zip in his step today * honeymoon between Obama administration and the press * White House Press Briefing ** Dr. Colbert is with Robert Gibbs * it's rude * CBS Bill Plant took the call when his phone rang Soda Tax * Johnny Law wants to infringe * Does not obey big government; he obeys his thirst * Senate considering taxes on soda and sugary drinks * You can have Stephen's soda when you pry it from his cold, diabetic hands * it makes him sick to his stomach * .25 cent tax per ounce on soda tax ** one of Dr. Colbert's better arguments (he burped; first time on television) * soda causes obesity ** $127 billion in health cost * people who drink soda are not fat; they're extreme! * is it bad when your urine comes out carbonated? * soft drink lobbyists say soda doesn't cause obesity ** things that are fun are never bad for you * protest the soda tax ** learned from the Tea Baggers ** do not name it something that has a double meaning: Stephen Colbert's Coke Parties Special Edition of Colbert Platinum * it's no secret the super-wealthy keep the economy ** alabaster bidet puts 100x more people to work than whatever type of bidet * Colbert Platinum! * Norma's in Le Parker Meridien ** $1,000 omelet *** $3 eggs *** $60 lobster *** $650 caviar *** $287 potatoes ** comes with toast * one thing sustained our ancestors when they came to Ellis Island * Dr. Colbert did not dine and dash Nino's Bellisima Pizza * $1,000 pie ** served cold ** with shaved lobster ** and 8 ounces of caviar *** does not come with crazy bread * it was one of the best $1,000 pizzas Dr. Colbert has ever had * when he thinks pizza he thinks: ** room temperature ** fish roe (eggs) ** and cashing in the college fund * Dr. Colbert burned off his lunch at Nino's by dashing over to Serendipity 3 Serendipity 3 * $1,000 sundae ** served with a gold spoon ** in a crystal goblet--lined with gold ** garnished with nuts dipped in gold ** featuring 3 scoops of vanilla ice cream covered in gold ** chocolates flown in from Italy ** candied fruit from Paris ** vanilla from Tahiti * a Klondike bar would have to fly many times around the world to match the carbon footprint of this sundae * they've sold one a month in the "good times" ** haven't sold one since November * 24-carat edible gold is also sprinkled on top * for another $1,000 Dr. Colbert could have a poor person watch him eat it ** could use more gold Interview * Michael Pollan ** book: "In Defense of Food: An Eater's Manifesto" * so Dr. Colbert put razor wire around his plate * Dr. Colbert offered him a can of Sierra Mist * we should be attacking the food to protect ourselves * is against American things, like American cheese ** it's processed ** Stephen doesn't want to undream the dream by reading the label * synthesize breast milk for 150 years * he was not breast fed * Stephen demands he apologize to his mother (who was in the audience) * we don't know enough about food * our bodies know what to do with corn ** the set is made of corn ** the table tastes like a sun chip * problem of deliciousness * uses science in his book ** science has done things for Cheetos * it's fun, it can't be bad for us ** once a week, not everyday * he was busted in Berkeley buying fruity pebbles ** it's a capitol offense * eat anything that is real ** cook it yourself ** less than 5 ingredients * says Dr. Colbert has a pasty complexion ** but he has wavy hair Epilogue * Dr. Colbert wonders if you noticed the theme running through the show: ** Stephen Colbert is awesome! Gallery File: File: File: File: File: File: File:Stephen's$1,000TourStop1.jpg File:Norma's1000Omelet.jpg File:Stephen's$1,000TourStop2.jpg File:Nino's1000Pizza.jpg File:Stephen's$1,000TourStop3.jpg File:Stephen's$1,000TourStop4.jpg File:PreparingGoldFlakes.jpg File:Stephen's$1,000TourStop5.jpg File:Serendipity3's1000Sundae.jpg File:Stephen's$1,000TourStop6.jpg File:Stephen's$1,000TourStop7.jpg File:Stephen's$1,000TourStop8.jpg File:LunchReview.jpg File:After$1000Dishes.jpg File:Stephen's$1,000TourStop9.jpg File: File: File: File: Official Truthy Videos * Colbert Nation Home Tube External Tubes *Link Title *Link Title Reviews and Comments